I want your Muzungu.

So I am sure you all remember my many rants on how difficult it is to be white in Uganda. Well the other day I learned something. It is far worse to be a friend to a white.

My friends here have been life savers, on more than one occasion they have stopped me from paying far to much money for transport, items, and groceries, they have taught me how to bargain, kept an eye out for pickpockets, and watched my bag when I carry my computer.

As it turns out boda riders and market vendors don’t like it when Ugandans tell muzungus the correct price.

My friends have faced some pretty nasty comments and rude statements, all of which aren’t worth repeating.

They also hear some pretty unrealistic questions and comments including but not limited to the following - translated from Luganda: (comments in the brackets my own additions)

“You, you give me that Muzungu.” (Oh, okay, here she is..)

“Where did you find that muzungu, where can I get one like her?” (The back corner of Owino, just look for the sign that says white women here.)

“You move from that seat, I want to sit next to the muzungu, I love her” (While riding a taxi, the comment came from a boda rider at a stage we were passing.)

“She is beautiful and healthy that muzungu, I will give you one dollar and you make her my wife.” (Seriously, only one dollar, a muzungu is worth much more than that – actually that’s what my friend said too.)

This list could go on, but you get the idea.

So to my friends who hear and take a lot of abuse on my behalf. Thanks.